MARRIED LIFE

There is a Look my wife gives me sometimes after I finish spouting off some inane and optimistic platitude, a Look which comprises a simple syllogism on the subject of married life from the woman's point of view. It says, "I feel sucky, therefore you suck." Also, it says, "Shut Up!"

To this Look, there can be no reply--it is the ultimate smackdown upon the foolhardy male impulse to convince his woman that actually, she should feel fine, even though she doesn't--once the Look has been given, a man can only resort to a jest which bypasses the subject completely. So one tells her what she just said without speaking, and that one is going to go blog about it. Then one does so.

Somehow, this actually makes her feel better, even though one quit trying to make her feel better. I don't get how that works. I just wish I could learn to shift to Humor before I bring the Look down on myself.